“Worldly” original work: qu secretary dies “nobody keeps spirit”, raising children for old age is the biggest mistake!
For the three children of the Zhou family, they are much more lucky than other people in the light word area, especially Zhou Bingkun, although there was no opportunity to go out like brother and sister in that year, but he stayed with his mother unexpectedly got a lot of people’s favor and help, among them Ma Shouchang and Qu Xiuzhen can be called his distinguished person.Zhou Bingkun’s feelings about the old couple are very complex, so as long as there is confusion about life, he is thinking of saying a few words with his two friends who forget their age and hope to get advice.Over time, in The heart of Zhou Bingkun, they became like relatives, as long as the old couple have something, he did not hesitate to help the first time.Moon has waxing and waning, people have joys and sorrows, not long after Zhou Bingkun released from prison, the old lady died of illness, before the scenery is infinite, but after death because of the corruption of the daughter-in-law implicated, not only the daughter-in-law grandson with money disappeared, the son was also imprisoned, the last journey also no one wake, cold.Well, the concept of raising a child, which is deeply rooted in everyone’s heart, is actually a lie.Filial piety, from the emotional equivalence.Every family has this difficult to read, whether it is living in the courtyard of ma Shouchang, Qu Xiuzhen old couple, or living in the light of the word area, every family has their own cut constantly manage also messy things.In these things, from an outsider’s point of view, the biggest sticking point is about children, and is about children’s filial piety or not, is the test of a family’s biggest external factors.Ma Shouchang and Qu Xiuzhen’s son, not around all the year round, emotional alienation also means that even if blood is close, can give birth to bad blood because of the distance.Two things are most obvious here.Zhou Bingkun and sauce factory “six small gentleman” together to their hearts to respect the song secretary happy New Year, and song old lady dumplings, although the old lady said the wind light cloud light son did not come back because of grandson sick, but words in words can feel her helplessness and lonely.Another time is Ma Shouchang hospitalized, although there is a retired cadre is responsible for, but after all, not his family, Qu Xiuzhen in the case of his son can not come back, had to call Zhou Bingkun.Zhou Bingkun said nothing hurried to the hospital, and even escort with vigil.On the contrary, his own son learned that his father was ok and rushed back to Shanghai the next day.Many things are not equal, especially the feelings between people, once not contacted for a long time, will inevitably be troubled by various factors, resulting in cracks between children and parents.Between parents and children, there will be a kind of inexplicable entanglement in them.However, in the course of decades of getting along with each other, children have been regarded as their own “private goods”, in the heart of every parent, treat this “private goods” extremely important and expect to be more perfect in the future.However, it is precisely because in this process, a move or words considered unimportant will lead to subtle changes in the relationship between children, but the vast majority of children will bear this change, and in the later more time, more self-expression.No one wakes up at the memorial. Can raising a child really prevent old age?In the original book, a few months after Zhou bingkun’s release from prison, he and Shao Jingwen visited Qu Xiuzhen, who was bedridden.During the visit, Zhou Bingkun looked at the gaunt Qu Xiuzhen twice sad.After the visit, Zhou Bingkun also wanted to tell once “six little gentleman”, hope they can take the time to see the old lady, but two days later, Qu Xiuzhen died.Qu Xiuzhen work is responsible for serious, conscientious and conscientious, but who can think of after the death of her memorial service without relatives wake, relevant leaders do not arrive, with shouldn’t have specifications cold end.This is because her daughter-in-law embezzled huge sums of money and disappeared abroad with her grandson, who has not been convicted but is also in custody.In the original work, there is such a description of the memorial service for the old lady qu: the old lady’s memorial service dragged on for a long time, and the events of her daughter-in-law and son affected the specifications and eulogy content of the memorial service.Until December, the various aspects finally unified opinion, business is not New Year, catch the memorial service held before New Year’s Day;No relatives wake, do not see the main leader figure, pay tribute to the people are not many, cold.Ma Shouchang and Qu Xiuzhen do not have hope that their sons and daughters-in-law can accompany their filial piety, they are responsible for the food, clothing, housing and transportation after retirement.What about ordinary people?When a person slowly begins to grow older, body and mind slowly decline, many things are actually the opposite.Children used to be afraid of their parents, but when people grow old they become weak because of inner fear and loneliness.Every family, over a long period of decades, faces 10 crises.The last two of the 10 crises are the ones that individuals dread facing: being a grandparent, full of privileges and pitfalls;Death comes to one spouse, then the other.At this point, expecting children or grandchildren to surround your lap is not always going to work.So, instead of living for others, you should care more and plan for your old age.Satya, in How New Families Shape People, gives five steps: 1. Know that an ending has happened.2. Mourn the loss.3. Understand the positive aspects of this closure.4. Focus and understand that there is room in your life to open up and implant new possibilities.Be ready to welcome new possibilities, take action, and create what you need.Aging is not terrible, terrible is losing the power to glow and heat after aging.It’s nice to have a child who is happy with you, but as an individual, that means there are possibilities.At the end.Some people think that Zhou Bingkun is “the world” in the typical filial piety to parents, in addition to him, others more or less do not enter the stream, even if it is a high position, light word area very not easy to fly out of Zhou Bingyi.Just like the summary of Filial piety for children by Feng Huacheng in the world, it is quite rare to occupy a head.There is no point in obsessing over yourself and your children. It is for the elderly to think about how to better themselves.